on writing (III)

A squirrel with a bazooka.
Though I'm  honestly concerned that this is not
an actual squirrel, but I care too little to check.
I'm thinking gopher?

Progress on my zombie serial novel is coming along well. The past two weeks have been spent (at least in regards to writing) revising and reshaping Act 2 (and tweaking Act 1 here-and-there). I put the bulk of the story in past tense, and already I'm seeing the benefits: it's quite easy to deal with the passage of time, to telescopically zoom out on events, and it keeps the story moving quickly. Contrary to popular belief, writing something in present-tense doesn't automatically make the story move quicker; the speed of the story has more to do with style than anything, making the text simple enough to carry the reader forward (something Hemingway knew quite well), and sometimes present-tense narrative can distract the reader from the story, since the reader's found himself burdened by a new style. I've also sought to make the story more story-driven than character-driven, and have added lots of material (and cut lots of material) to try and move towards that end. I'm content with where I'm at in the zombie story right now, and I'm anticipating having the first book done maybe by the end of next month. 

I was telling my pal Andy just the other day how I'm not sure how it'll be received; the other two zombie stories I wrote ("36 Hours" in 2004, redone in late 2009, and the "Dwellers of the Night" trilogy completed in spring of 2009) did remarkably well, the first gaining points for its story-driven plot and the second gaining points for its character-driven plot. One "Best of" list for post-apocalyptic fiction ranked the first alongside Stephen King's "The Stand" and Cormac McCarthy's "The Road". Point of all this being, I know that my readers will be probably be expecting something along the lines of both where the impending crisis happened immediately, at the off-set at the book, but with this serial novel, things are gradual, and there's only one real "zombie encounter" in the first 300+ page novel. But that's okay, because I wanted to do it this way, and perhaps one day I'll let you know why.

the 22nd week

Turns out that "squirrels with guns"
is a big deal to a lot of people out there.

Monday. Surprisingly, I didn't work early this morning, instead closing with Amos (where I accidentally flooded the backroom with mop-water because I just forgot about it). Before our close I went to The Anchor to do some writing, and after work Brandy came over and we smoked hookah and blew smoke bubbles. All night it was col and rainy and dark (obviously, because it was night-time and all). "It's GROSS out there!" Blake exclaimed. He's terrified of birds. Not just birds of prey, which would be logical, but ALL birds. Carly texted me, tried out Dusmesh for the first time. She was all up in knots about it, but who wouldn't be? I'd eat there every day if I could. 

Tuesday. I missed my morning trip to The Anchor because I forgot to set my alarm. We were superbly slow, finished by 5:00 and just waiting to close, and after work we had our training with Roberto. I spent the evening hanging out with Ams and Amos, had some pretzels for dinner, and did some writing and shot zombies. Mandy, Rob, and Ams grabbed donuts from Kroger, and Ams let me have one of hers!

Wednesday. Turns out that donut I ate was actually Mandy's. Welp. I was thinking about going to The Anchor before my 7:30 shift, woke up at 5:30, got up, had my morning cigarette, and then said, "To hell with this," and slept till about 7:00. Being the day before Thanksgiving with the vast majority of our customers being off work or out-of-town, we were insanely slow, the deadest day I've ever worked. I was done with all my stuff by about 8:30, and I spent the rest of the morning just hanging out and drinking cappuccinos and lattes and eating marked-out cookies with Emily, Khristian, and Tiffany. I got out early and then ran off to the discount Gap outlet to buy some new clothes. Mandy tagged along and even drove ('cause she has her IPOD radio and my normal radio doesn't work in the cold, period). I got a winter jacket, three shirts, and a pair of jeans for $60, that's about a $200 value. It was pretty awesome. We took 471N back and marveled at the majestic skyline at sunset on our way across the bridge. I had a wrap for dinner and spent the night mostly alone, until Jessie and Tony came by (they're house-sitting at the Sulzener's), and then Ams and I hung out quite late into the night.

THANKSGIVING. I went to The Anchor for breakfast and got home just in time to bid farewells to Rob and Mandy (headed to Indianapolis), and to Blake as well (who flew south to Lexington). ("Flew" here being a figure of speech, i.e. he went there quickly; no one would fly from here to Lexington, unless you were rich or piloting a medivac, since it's only like an hour and a half drive.) Ams and I prepped for the day and then joined the parents in Dayton and then shot up to New Carlisle. Lunch was grand as always: turkey, sweet potatoes, whole wheat rolls, a wild assortment of casseroles, all polished off with homemade apple cider and coffee. Megan had her newborn there; "Wanna hold her?" "No," I said. I don't hold fresh babies, I'm just too afraid I'll drop one and break it and be in jail the rest of my life whilst being hated by family. So, no, I'll pass on that. When we got back to Dayton--after a dessert of pumpkin pie sprinkled with glaze pecans--Aunt Teri & Uncle Bill were at the house with Grandma. So good to see them all. "Have you lost more weight?" Bill asked. No, I've actually gained like 5-6 pounds in the last two months; but people say I look better now than I did when I was getting sickly skinny. When Ams and I got home, I got to meet her work friend Josh, and I watched "Elf" in Blake's room and all but passed out in his bed. I fought the urge. His sheets, they're like satin, I can't begin to imagine the thread-count.

BLACK FRIDAY. "Do you know why it's called Black Friday? 'Cause after the pilgrims had their Thanksgivings, they had discounted slave auctions the next day." - another classic quote from Andy Waugh. I slept in this morning till 10:00, had O.J. for breakfast and ran by the bank. I went for an afternoon drive through Eden Park and back, and at the house I cranked The Avett Brothers over House Tunes and did some writing. 'Round 3:00 I met up with Jessie and Tony at Skyline. It was so good catching up with her, reflecting on our "glory days" at C.C.U.  and all our hysterical and cherished memories. I had a goofy outburst and the waitress across the room exclaimed, "What the hell was that?!" to which I raised my hand and confessed. She gave me weird looks the rest of the meal. Oh: Jessie's old Bloc pal Sam was walking down the road, and Jessie beckoned her in, and she ate with us, too. Amos came home and we were gonna go visit Ams at Chic-Fil-A but he went to Brandy's to house-sit with her, so I went ahead and did some more writing. I went to The Anchor in the evening, doing some scripting for my zombie story. T.J. came over, and we drank beer and shot zombies and had good Front Porch Times with Blake and Rob.

Saturday. I went to The Anchor upon waking, did some decent writing, still plowing through Act 2. When I got back I hung out with Mandy and her cousin Cameron (who came home with them late last night). Around noon I got Dusmesh with T.J., and I hung out with Mandy afterwards. Blake, Brandy, Amos and Andy were all there, too. At one point Mandy and I were just sitting in the front yard, me in a chair and her in the grass, just enjoying nature. And then she found an entire world swallowed up in the chipping paint and archaic rust on the hood of my car. "I feel like a little clown-fish wrapped in a sea anemone when I'm with you guys! Can you imagine how great it'd be to be a clown-fish in a sea anemone? Because that's how great it is to be with you guys." I headed up to Dayton to celebrate Thanksgiving with Mom's side: we grabbed Marion's Pizza, even ordered ahead so we could get there, eat up, and get out without any messes. It was fun seeing everyone: Aunt Teri & Uncle Bill, Grandma, Jared & Ashley, and Jesse & Mandy (who's pregnant, woot-woot). And Boozer came, too! After our dinner we drank beers and spiced eggnog and played some cards games like Phase 10. Ams and I didn't get home 'till about midnight, and I promptly passed out.

Sunday. I woke up bloated and hurting from Dusmesh and Marion's yesterday, and my bowels were quite clear: "Let's not do this again." Duly noted, and I have a monkey's gait to prove it. I slept in till 11:00, much to everyone's surprise. I haven't slept that late in like a year. I cleaned my room and shared coffee and cigarettes on the front porch with Cameron and Amos. Did some pleasant writing, went to the bank, and had a Bolthouse smoothie for lunch. It started to rain so Mandy, Amos, Ams, Cameron and I played Phase 10. Andy came over bearing some coffee from Nashville, and a whole bunch of us just spent the evening hanging out and shooting zombies (it's kind of our thing).

a shout-out

There are moments when it just hits you, and for a moment you can see, and taste, the countless blessings you can claim as your own. This evening I stood out on the front porch and smoked a cigarette and listened to Explosions in the Sky, and it was dark and the rains drizzled off the roof. I just watched the rain and listened to some of the best damned instrumentals you can find, and I felt the blessings of having a loving and devoted family, a sister who's your best friend, countless friends that you actually like, housemates you love, co-workers you can be yourself around and a job that's fun and pays well enough. All of these things, they're things that I take for granted, things that I'll truly appreciate until after they're gone. It's strange how we feel the absence of blessings more than we feel the presence of them. If life's all about relationships, then I have everything pretty much checkered-off (except for a romantic partner, but just 'cause you want a gold toilet doesn't mean it's in the cards, and it's not that big a deal anyways). I don't want to be thankless, I want to be thankful, and in the end this post goes out to all those who read my blog: I'm thankful for you (and I know who reads my blogs, so I know I'm thankful for each and every one of you). 

Here's a picture, too! (Because Ams likes pictures in my posts) It's the first in a week-long series entitled "Squirrels With Guns." Thus the number of posts this week will be wholly dependent upon how many pictures of squirrels with guns I can find.

It's a squirrel. With a gun. You tell me.

of skyline and squirrels

I was intentionally being weird in this photograph,
I want to establish that from the get-go.

Jessie was in town, so she and her husband and I met up at Skyline Chili in Price Hill. It's probably the most ghetto Skyline Chili in Cincinnati. I haven't had Skyline since Monica came and visited when I first moved down here; three cheese coneys and a side of fries sprinkled with salt and pepper, all washed down with diet mountain dew and some oyster crackles bathed in a light hot-sauce glaze. It was so good getting to talk to her, getting to catch up. We reflected on earlier times, hilarious moments in our friendship, when we lived in an entirely different world: she wasn't married and hadn't even met Tony, just had her heart broken by Kyle (who's now married), and I was head-over-heels for this Thai chick with no idea why. She was there for the tail-end of my Karen escapades, and we grew super close as we meshed into the same friend group: Gambill, Kyle, and me paired off with Deshay, Jessie, and Sa-Rah. Gambill had a thing for Deshay, Kyle and Jessie dated for a bit, and I was swooned by the Thai (again, with no real reason why). As much as life's currents twists and turns, and as much as worlds change and grow apart, it's really something special that Jessie and I can pick up where we left off and just get to hang out again like no time's passed. 

Oh: one of my koala outbursts startled our waitress, and she exclaimed, "What the hell was that?!" and I raised my hand across the dining area and said, "That was me, nothing to worry about." Jessie was all up in stitches: "I've never seen a waitress react to your little weird quirks like that!" Oh, it happens often.

Later on in the evening T.J. came over, and we drank beers and shot zombies and with the weather a bit warmer, we hung out on the front porch after sunset, shooting the shit with Blake and Rob. T.J. and I always have interesting conversations. One minute we'll be talking about cosmonauts who don't give a shit (Russian astronauts are flat-out crazy, there's no way around that) and the next minute we'll be calling down hellfire and brimstone on squirrels just because, well, they're squirrels and they probably deserve it. We're getting Dusmesh tomorrow: I was scared I might miss it this weekend what with all the Thanksgiving festivities, but T.J. stepped up and made it happen. Kudos to the kid.

thanksgiving '11

The cliche thing to do on Thanksgiving is write about things you're thankful for. Because I am on a time constraint, and because I'm too lazy to come up with anything spectacular, here are a few things that I am legitimately thankful for. Note: these are things I'm actually thankful for, not things I should be thankful for. All of these things are good, but you won't find listed, for example, thankfulness for the fact that I have food in my stomach and a roof over my head. I live in a first-world country and feel entitled to such privileges, these aren't concerns of mine. It's entirely selfish, but that's the way it is. Now for those things I'm legitimately thankful for: my family, especially my little sister; my friends, here in Cincinnati and abroad; and I'm thankful for all the people with whom I live: Rob & Mandy, Blake, Amos, and (of course) Ams. I'm thankful that I have a good job where I make decent money and have fun with the people I work with, and I'm thankful for places like The Anchor where I can escape and drink coffee and orange juice and write, like I'm doing right now with this blog post.

There. I got that out of the way.

It took clenched teeth and gritty resolve, but we did it.

Cliche blog posts FTW.

Now for a deeper tangent: a telescopic look at thankfulness. On Thanksgiving we're primarily focused on those things we're thankful for now. But thankfulness doesn't--or shouldn't--burn itself out in matters of the present. We ought to be thankful for those things in our past, those good memories and cherished friendships and old lovers and those things we went through that have shaped us for better. Our thankfulness should stretch past the present into the future, into a thankfulness for all the blessings and strokes of luck that are to come our way, a thankfulness for what the future holds (while hoping that future's good). Admittedly those with no concept of an afterlife, those without any hope of a world reborn, may find such forward-looking thankfulness laughable. But I think that we should try and be thankful for those things we have as well as those things we don't have, thankful for what's behind and for what's ahead. Maybe Thanksgiving's not just about figuring out what you're thankful for; maybe we can step into the shoes of the first settlers with their first thanksgiving, settlers looking back on a treacherous journey and looking forward into the terrifying unknown, and celebrating in the moment the fact that between the past and the future, amidst the ongoing journey, they're not doing this alone but with others. I like that take.

the 21st week

Ams says she doesn't like it when I recap my week. 

She can suck it.

Monday. The new hire started today. Emily, a chick with purple hair. Mandy and I hung out for a while when I got home from work, and Blake and Ams joined us for a quick trip to Roh's Street. The iced latte was delicious. Brandy came over for a little while later in the evening. When she went home a big-ass storm rolled through. The walls were shaking, the windows rattling, the kind of thunder you feel in your chest, hammering sheets of rain, tornado watch, all that. I used the time indoors in the treacherous weather to do some writing. As an aside, I REALLY need to get a game-plan for this thing called Life. Just floating along and seeing where it goes isn't all it's cracked up to be. There's no purpose there, and I just can't stomach that.

Tuesday. Visited The Anchor upon waking and then closed shop with Amos. The storms last night brought in a biting cold, and the rains fell all evening. Everything gray and dreary. Winter: ugh. I hate how it's pitch black outside by the time we're walking past Fountain Square down towards the river. Mandy and I got groceries at Kroger, and I made eggs and toast for dinner. I talked to Mandy K. for a bit tonight; I really do miss her. Ams went on a date with some tall guy named Sean, and she gave me and Mandy the inside-scoop when she got home.

Wednesday. HUMP DAY! As some might call it. The morning was about as miserable as all day yesterday, but by the time I got off work, it was absolutely beautiful: clear skies, the air warm, birds doing their thing in the trees. Isaac and I had some good Front Porch Times, and Mandy was so nice and bought me a clothes rack to hang my clothes. Amos and I shot zombies, and I went on a drive through Eden Park while listening to "Mumford & Sons." Eggs and toast for dinner yet again, and I passed out on the sofa while watching "30 Rock", and my little sister prodded me awake, saying, "It's time for bed, Anthony." So precious.

Thursday. Mandy made a chemex of our dark roast Mexican chiapis when I woke up. We both get up at the same time now, I like it. I hit up The Anchor before work and then closed down with Amos and Emily. She's really cool: punkish/indie look, scratchy-purple hair, weird tattoos, a whimsical sense of humor. She's in a band called The Apricots--folk music, I think?--and her fiance's this grizzly-looking guitarist in some other band. Amos and I shot zombies when we got home, and Ams and I joined Mandy for a trip to Kroger. Dinner: 1/2 a pizza, two cookies, and ice cream. Wow. Wholly enjoyable, but I gots to curb dat. Spent the rest of the night hanging with Mandy, Ams, Blake, & Amos. I left my phone at work.

Friday. Rob woke me up on his way out the door. I ran off to work. It was a busy morning and a dead afternoon. I trained Emily on closing down the salad bar, and then I smoked a cigarette with her and Blake. Deposited my check, went on a drive, and took a nap past sunset (which, really, is done by 5:45). I had a damned good salad for dinner, and spent the night hanging out with Blake, Amos, & Ams. Amos and I shot zombies, and Ams joined us. She likes shooting zombies, too. How precious!

Saturday. Woke to find Rob making a pour-over of Tazza's new Select Coffee, an El Salvador. He was kind to let me have some. It tastes like honey with apple and cinnamon notes. Baller. I did some blogging at The Anchor and then got Dusmesh with Rob, Mandy, Amos & Andy W. My entire evening was spent writing (or, rather, rewriting) parts of my zombie story. Blake and I had good one-on-one time, talking about our histories with girls: the comedic, the tragic, and the classic. We're eerily similar. Blayne came over for a little while, and I took one of my prized late-night drives. Amos and I grabbed dinner and shot zombies, and then Ams and I hung out for a while and joined Blake and Amos in Blake's room. We were up there for a long while, and I passed out on his bed.

Sunday. Rob and Mandy were gonna go hiking, but Mandy was sick from her last-night activities, so that didn't happen. I hit up The Anchor for coffee, and when I got home, Rob had some more coffee made, so I had some of that, too. I spent the morning writing, ran to the bank, and had pretzels for lunch. I made some chocolate chip cookies with vanilla cake ice cream and sprinkles, and it was damned good. Ams, Amos, Blake and I went to Rock Bottom, Ams' treat. Amos and I smoked out by the fountain, and I was shocked at how quiet it was. It was abandoned except for the fountain and the Christmas lights. For a fleeting moment I pretended there was a zombie apocalypse and we were striding downtown in the dead of night smoking our cigarettes and reflecting on happier times. The weird part is that I was happier in the pretend world than I am in the real one; but that's why fantasies flourish.

waaay too close to 9/11

BLAKE HUDSON 

FOR PRESIDENT

These colors don't run!