on purpose

Any purpose that we embrace mustn't pull us from actual life, because then our purpose becomes, at best, some maneuver to unplug ourselves from the machine; or, at worst, it becomes nothing but our own brand of heroine, something we swallow to try and make sense of a world that, half the time, makes no sense. Some time ago I went to my pal Brandon's loft in northern Cincinnati, and we listened to The Avett Brothers and talked 'bout what we want out of life, our goals and how we're getting there. He's got everything mapped out while I have nothing figured out. It's not that I don't have "hopes & dreams" (God knows I do; and you, my faithful blog reader, know that, too); it's that I question both the legitimacy of these dreams ("Are they even possible, even reachable? Are they worth fighting for, worth investing in, worth hoping for? Or are these hopes and dreams my own form of T.H.C., pulling me from the darkness of our world into a light fabricated in my own mind?") as well as the pursuit of these dreams ("If they're unreachable, why pursue them? If they're uncertain, is it wise to devote yourself to them?"). And as for goals, well, I've learned that life hardly ever works out the way you want it to (or even expect it to), and despite all your striving and struggling, all can be lost in a heartbeat. The uncertainty, the unknowing, the weight of the world strangling our little ambitions and flimsy hopes... Sometime's it's difficult to bear.

When it comes back to purpose (as it often does for us westerners saturated with existential ideals), despite the craving I have for it, I can't easily embrace one. Any purpose embraced should, I think, fit these criterion:

1) It must be in accordance with the nature of perceived reality. 

2) It must be embraced for *mostly* pure motives. 

3) It must transcend the Self and be outward-focused, i.e. on something bigger than just me and my life.  

4) Because the destination is never certain, the journey must be as valuable, if not more-so, than the intended and hoped-for destination.

5) Its pursuit and practice must cultivate my humanity rather than detract from it. 

6) It must be cemented in real life, not detached from it or in a vacuum.

I tend not to be too legalistic, but with this, I am: purpose isn't a small thing. It's something that, if we let it, will change and mold our lives, sometimes for the better and often for the worse. The power that lies in purpose (or, at least, the power we give it), and the subsequent power that lies within its pursuit, renders any nonchalant attitude towards it a chief folly. Purpose has the power to grant life or ruin it, the power to turn us into angels or shape us into demons. It's not something to be taken lightly, if it's something at all: in the end, there could very well be no purpose except that which we grant ourselves. Ecclesiastes, the most realistic (albeit sobering) book of the bible tells us what to do with our lives, gives us our purpose: "Enjoy life the best you can and honor God in it." Maybe anything we add to this is just frill & flare?