I went for a drive this morning to think about everything going on in my life. I went to U.C., promptly became lost, and somehow ended up in Over-the-Rhine. I followed Vine Street down into the heart of Cincinnati, and took the roads between and along the Reds and Bengals stadiums to get back to Eighth Street, up Glenway, and back onto my beloved campus. I don't have much to do today. I am in a state of numbness. Amos is coming down today, which should be good. I head home this evening, because I'm teaching a class on "Grace" at my church. I'm pretty excited. I'm also quite hungry and thinking about getting something to eat. I wrote this last night when I got back to my dorm:

i just don't know what to do anymore

i want to give up
but for some reason i keep pressing on
hoping that things might,
one day,
work out.

is it an illusion? am i hoping
for a resolution that will never come?

i wish life were more simple
it's always so damned complicated.

* * *

I fell asleep quickly last night, and I woke up to screams and the sound of crashing next door. I laid in bed terrified. I think it was all in my head; the time was 2:13 and I had gone to bed at 1:40, so I imagine I fell into a fitful sleep an was woken by a bad dream.