U.C.C. INFP-style

I've been going to University Christian Church as of late, whenever I can, weaseling my way in INFP style. Social gatherings without a personal companion are always intimidating for me, and as much as I'd like to think my mannerisms challenge social norms, Mandy made a good point when she said, "There's a difference between challenging social norms and being challenged by them." She has a good point. 

My hardcore introverted side cringes at the thought of being immersed in a sea of people whom I don't know, people who might try to talk to me, and U.C.C. is perfect, because it has a balcony for all the introverts (comparing the "Meet and Greet" in the balcony to the "Meet and Greet" on the main level rises striking contrasts). Here we can sit, observe, think, and not feel ourselves drained by the crowd surrounding us. We don't have to find ourselves squashed and suffocated by euphoric worship; we have our corner above to be subdued and contemplative.

As much as I'd like to just sit and think in obscurity throughout the whole thing, I know I can't let my introverted side dictate everything I do. Just as introverts need to push their "comfort zones," so do we introverts. I participated in communion the other day, something I had to literally stomach the nerve to do. I always like it when communion is passed on trays, it lets me stay in my quiet and meditative state without interruption. U.C.C. does the more communal style where you gather together in a line, take your juice and cracker from the tray at the front of the sanctuary, and then take it back to your seat. This means I have to get up from my seat in the balcony, go down to the main level, and then blend myself with the crowd. Seriously. It was like panic attack central. But I pulled it off, and it wasn't too awkward, and someone even smiled at me, which was cool. Part of stretching my safety zone is actually participating in "Meet and Greet"; generally I leave the apartment (or the Anchor) five minutes late to try and miss that part, though sometimes I terrifyingly get stuck in the middle of it with all the other awkward introverts up there with me. But I'm going to start showing up on time, and I think if I treat them as I would treat customers at the cafe, I'll do all right.

All this talk about introversion in the church leads me to my last point: I've been reading a book called (originally enough) Introverts in the Church, and it's about how the modern church is biased towards extroversion and even prejudiced against introversion, to the point where introverts' gifts are marginalized and their lack of enthusiasm about extroverted ideals is seen as spiritual weakness. Much of the book is about introversion as a whole and how introverts can participate and contribute to the church's mission in ways that are in sync with their God-given introverted personalities. It's a kickass book, and I'm sure quotes from it will be on this blog in due time.