an INFP koala (IV)

"Although stand-offish, non-social, and often awkward in big groups of people or with people we don’t know, with those we do know and love, we’re very warm and friendly, so-much so that we go at great lengths to avoid any conflict that threatens the safety and comfort of the relationship."

The last two INFP traits I looked at in my own life are more internally focused than outwardly focused. In other words, you don’t actually see that part of me. But when it comes to how I actually operate in the world, my INFP personality shines. I’m shy and timid, apprehensive about friendships but, once a friendship is established, I am very open, honest, and “real” around these people. I have lots of acquaintances, many friends, and even fewer “best friends”—those people you connect with on a deep level, where you can be yourself and be loved in spite of your awkward comments and social blunders. “Warm and Friendly” is a good descriptor of our dispositions towards those people we love, and we take our relationships very seriously. We thrive in harmony and detest disharmony. We loathe drama and try to keep it from affecting our friendships. When we feel the friendship is threatened, we will literally do everything within our power to keep the harmony alive. This is all good and well, but there comes times when we fight for a friendship that we don’t even want. Disharmony is so hated that we strive for harmony in friendships we don’t even want to be in, and we fight to keep the friendship when (a) we lose nothing if the friendship dissolves and (b) we gain nothing if the friendship remains intact.