If I, deeply in love with another, begin describing with passionate appreciation what has been unnoticed or ignored by everyone else for years, some people around me are sure to dismiss me, "Love is blind." They mean that love diminishes my capacity to see what is actually there so that fantasy, tailor-made to fit my desires, can be projected on another and thus make him or her acceptable as a lover. The cynical follow-up is that if that did not happen, if I saw the other truly, I would never get involved. Why? Because everyone is, in fact, quite unlovely, either visibly or invisibly, or, in some particularly unfortunate cases, both. Love doesn't see truth but creates illusions and incapacitates us for dealing with the hard-edged realities of life.
But that popular saying, as popular sayings so often are, is wrong. It is hate that is blind. It is habit, condenscension, cynicism that are blind. Love opens eyes. Love enables the eyes to see what has been there all along but was overlooked in haste or indifference. Love corrects astigmatism so that what was distorted in selfishness is now perceived accurately and appreciatively. Love cures shortsightedness so that the blur of the distant other is now in wondrous focus. Love cures farsightedness so that opportunities for intimacy are no longer blurred threats but blessed invitations. Love looks at the one who had '"no form or comeliness that we should lock at him, and no beauty that we should desire him" and sees there the "fairest of the sons of men... anointed with the oil of gladness above your fellows."
If we could see the other as he is, as she is, there is no one we would not see as "fairest... all fragrant with myrrh and aloes and cassia." Love penetrates the defenses that have been built up to protect against rejection and scorn and belittlement, and it sees life created by God for love.
If we could see the other as he is, as she is, there is no one we would not see as "fairest... all fragrant with myrrh and aloes and cassia." Love penetrates the defenses that have been built up to protect against rejection and scorn and belittlement, and it sees life created by God for love.
"If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love."
- 1 Corinthians 13:3
3 comments:
This is by Eugene Peterson, taken from a daily devotional titled, "Living the Message." He wrote the Message bible, for those who don't know who Peterson is.
Your words are beautiful, they often are, and reflect a deeper beauty in your soul and a tremendous, drawing, admirable appreciation for this life and this world that God has laid out before us. I am thankful you share your thoughts with us.
Thank you, Katherine. My hope is that the same beautiful words I write on paper are reflected in a beautiful life.
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