of umbrellas and enlightenments

During work a massive storm came through. The wind picked up one of the umbrellas on the patio and hurled it fifty feet through the air and into the field beside the cafe. Forrest and I ran out into the hammering rain and chased after it. Once we reached it we both grabbed the pole and tried to carry it but the wind kept circling inside the umbrella and carrying us this way and that. Eventually we got it back to the patio and only then did we realize we were stupid and could've just closed it. So we closed it and set it down and went inside and were soaking wet through the rest of the evening. When it rains things are pretty slow, so we both got to go home early. An old friend and his fiance came into the cafe--General Lee!--and his brother Chris showed up so after work I hung out with them for a bit. Now I'm at home and overcome with many thoughts mixed with a concoction of sorrow and resolve. Enlightenment can be such a bitch, especially when the enlightenment deals with something that you're not supposed to know and no one else knows. So you can't talk about it to anyone, unless you speak in code, and it's nightmarish.

I have work off tomorrow. Dylan is in Tennessee now and will be till Tuesday. Tyler is going to come over and we're going to grab a meal and play Mario Kart and enjoy good conversation and, perhaps, beer as well. Maybe I will talk to him about everything that has been going down. I'm sure his response will be what everyone else's response--not knowing this specific "enlightenment" but the situation in general--has been: to "cut the cord." All friendships die, either fizzling out slowly or being brutally murdered. In this case, everyone suggests I brutally murder the friendship. I haven't really been on board with that idea--for a number of reasons--but this enlightenment seems to reveal what I knew to be true all along: they were right.