in the meantime

I have no idea what I want to do with my life, and it sucks. I have a degree in biblical studies, am working full-time in the world of coffee, and I have borderline zero interest in doing “professional” and “institutionalized” ministry. Perhaps part of the way I feel—this restlessness tinged with complacency—is due to the fact that I enjoy making coffee and I don’t really want to do ministry, even though that’s what my degree is in. I could always go get my Master’s in something, but what would I get it in? And how in the hell would I afford it? Rob is passionate about coffee, and he’s got an amazing job with Taza Mia in Cincinnati. I enjoy coffee, but I’m not passionate about it like he is. I’m passionate about writing, but most people who know this will tell me, “Make a living off your writing!” without realizing how extremely difficult that actually is. The majority of authors devote their entire lives to it and get nowhere. It has nothing to do with how talented you are; rather, it has to do with whether or not you catch a lucky break. On the one hand, I really enjoy writing stories, and I’m good at it. On the other, I’m a realist and know that “making a living” as a published author would be both a dream come true and just that—a dream come true. I also enjoy biblical studies, studying the scriptures and all that, figuring out the puzzles of Christianity and looking at things in different lights, so I’ve been trying to figure out a way to integrate my love for writing and my love for the scriptures. The simplest thing I can think of would be to write bible studies or devotionals. Thing is, I haven’t actually used a bible study or a devotional in about 5-6 years. I don’t know what they’re like! That’s probably a good thing, if I try to do this; but, in the end, I find myself in a sea of “unknowing” regarding what I want to do in life. So in the meantime I’ll just keep working at Starbucks and be paying my bills.